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Sharing Thoughts

12/12/2016 0 Comments

You Can Be All - At One Time

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12/11/2016 0 Comments

Little Things We Can Do to Help Ourselves

Know how you feel when you sing along to that catchy tune on the radio, or stepping outside the door and letting the sun or wind caress our faces, or the smell of cut grass, how enjoying any of these can just lift our spirits. During Winter we need more of these spirit lifting moments. Here are some more suggestions courtesy of thejournal.ie

YOUR MENTAL HEALTH, just like your physical health, is something you need to look after, and something you can do a lot to take care of.

Doing little things that make you feel better regularly, particularly when things are tough, is one of the best ways to boost your mood and reduce stress and anxiety.
Last week we asked our readers what they do to make themselves feel better when they’re down, and there are some great tips in there. Here are some of the best we got. What are yours?

1. Exercise – especially outdoors 

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Image Source: Fit Approach via Flickr/CC
Reader Justin Healy wrote:
Cycle/run/walk/hike… any exercise… you’ll feel better after it!Exercise is great for your all-round health and doing it outdoors brings added benefits. It gets you out of the house, and being in nature can help lift depression, improve energy and boost your overall mood.

2. Sing a song

Reader Whistlestop told us:
Sing in the car, kitchen, shower…Singing has been found to lessen the feelings of depression and loneliness and choral singing in particular can sustain psychological well-being. Of course, you don’t need to join a choir or group to reap the benefits – you can sing anywhere, and you don’t even have to be any good for it to make you feel better.

3. Do some reading

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Source: ZapTheDingbat via Flickr/CC
Reader Feargal De Cantuin suggested:
Read a good book or poem.Getting away from screens, including phones, tablets and televisions, is good for your stress levels and immersing yourself in a book has multiple benefits. From improving your concentration rate to just being a cosy way to relax, grabbing a book is a nice way to take some time for yourself.

4. Think of a small act of kindness for someone else

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Image Source: The Free Hugs Day | by greglobinski Flickr
Reader Whistlestop also said:
Do something good for another person no matter how small. Let someone out in traffic, compliment someone on their service, make someone a cup of tea/coffee…Whether you do an act of kindness for a stranger or someone you know, it’s a great way to help yourself feel better. Helping someone out, having a chat and a cup of tea, or even just giving someone a compliment are all easy ways to show a little kindness.

5. Watch something funny or uplifting

Reader Davy Boy gave his suggestion:
Watching a five-minute film about Ireland’s oldest ice cream man. He’s referring to an article on TheJournal.ie about John Taylor, who’s been an ice-cream man for 49 years. The article included a short film about him. You can watch it here. Laughter is known to release stress, so you could go to a comedy show or watch a funny film, too.

6. Be creative

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Image Source: pexels.com
Finally, a couple of readers suggested indulging your creative or artistic side – whether it’s painting, drawing, or simply listening to music rather than switching on the news.
Research backs up the benefits of creativity as part of helping with negative feelings. It doesn’t matter what form your creativity takes – dancing, knitting, gardening – they’ll all bring positive impact to your life.

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11/11/2016 0 Comments

What exactly is melancholy, and what (if anything) should we do about it?

If you are a living, breathing human being, chances are you have felt sad at least a few times in your life. But what exactly is melancholy, and what (if anything) should we do about it? Courtney Stephens details our still-evolving understanding of sadness -- and even makes a case for its usefulness.

http://ed.ted.com/lessons/a-brief-history-of-melancholy-courtney-stephens​
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8/11/2016 0 Comments

Self Forgiveness

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Not many of us can say we've no regrets, or that past baggage is not holding us back. We nearly all have something that can haunt us. Moving on, forgiving, letting go,  can be hard. Paige Bartholomew, Licensed Psychotherapist, Hypnotherapist, Author, has some suggestions. 
Forgiving yourself can be a tough one because the person who feels angry, and the person you're angry with is the same person — YOU! We get stuck in self-judgment. We can't let ourselves off the hook. Maybe we betrayed our own integrity. Maybe we betrayed someone we love. We think we are bad and we don't know how to get over it.
Steps for self-forgiveness:
1. See your own innocence. Close your eyes and imagine you are two: one of you is your higher self and the other of you is your childhood self. See how innocent that child is? If she did do something wrong - she didn't do it on purpose! Her intentions were pure. She is beautiful. Sweet. Lovable. In your higher self, go to her and hug her. Give her some of the love she never had. Drink it in for a while.
2. Understand and accept. Close your eyes and imagine you are two: one of you is your higher self, and the other of you is the one who did something you're not proud of. From your higher self, look upon that unforgivable person. Ask yourself, "What motivated the unsavory behavior? Did it come out of a deep wound? Did it come out of loneliness? Depression? Despair? What would have made me behave in this way?" Find a reason. If you can't find one, make up the most plausible reason for the moment (this will help you get closer). There is ALWAYS a reason we do what we do.
When we behave badly, it is ALWAYS originating from a place of inner confusion, hurt, or despair.
3. Love yourself. Free yourself. From your higher-self perspective, open your heart. Go to the "bad" part of you and hug her. Imagine love pouring out of your heart and showering her with it. You may imagine that she resists it. That's ok — stay with it anyway. Shower love. Say, "You made a mistake, but I know that you are good in your core. The mistake can be repaired. Love will show you how to make repairs with those whom you have wronged. I give you the gift now of release. You may start anew here." Let the love seep into the places that you cannot forgive in yourself. Let it wash you. If you stay with it, it will change these places... you'll feel and visualize shifts happening right before your inner eyes. Let the sighs come. Let the ease come. Feel the pressure lift.
4. Do this every day until you can see yourself differently.
5. Clean things up with others. If it's possible, repair the damage with people you have hurt. Make amends. That's all that's required. If you are sincere, they will know, and you will know. Constant and repeated penance is not necessary.
You've heard it before — you're human. You make mistakes like everyone else. The TRUTH is — there is no mistake you could make in all the world that would make you un-lovable. There is no action, word or thought that is un-forgivable. Spiritual growth means we must do the deep work of self-forgiveness. Until this work is complete, we'll have trouble moving on into healthy relationships with others. The Universe doesn't make mistakes. Every moment is a brilliant opportunity for spiritual evolution. Self-love is the beginning.
​http://simplereminders.com/20150914204736.html

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3/11/2016 0 Comments

The Four Biggest Fears People have About Coming Into Therapy

Below is a very interesting article from Michaela McCarthy - would any of these points be relative to you and stop you from seeking the support you need? If after reading this article you would like to talk, please ring me on 087 285 9985, or connect with me using the Contact form on my website. Thank you. Katrina 

If life is getting on top of you, and daily struggles are becoming too much, then you may come to a point when you’re ready to reach out for psychological help. The decision to come into therapy can take courage. Yet the very act of asking for support can be daunting in itself.
While weekly counselling and psychotherapy sessions can support you as you explore your issues and gain a greater understanding of yourself, for some people there are fears holding them back from allowing themselves this experience.
Here we share the four biggest fears that people have about coming into therapy – and how to overcome them.
  1. Fear of falling apart
Over the years you will have put robust defences in place – often established from childhood – that you use to keep you going. Defences – like keeping a stiff upper lip, or refusing to cry – can be like scaffolding holding you up. You fear that if you let those defences down then your whole structure will fall apart. If you give in to your feelings of anxiety, sadness, loss or loneliness, then you fear you will be overwhelmed and unable to recover.
This is a very real fear, especially if you have valiantly ‘coped’ for many years. Yet the process of therapy, and the relationship with your therapist, will make it gradually safer for you to soften those defences and allow access to the raw feelings beneath. You won’t experience anything you won’t be able to deal with – and, in fact, the feelings often wait until you are ready. Therapy is about trusting that process.
  1. Fear of being judged or shamed
Yes, it may seem initially rather odd to open up to a complete stranger about the issues that are troubling you. If you generally keep your problems to yourself, then it can feel exposing to hear yourself talk about stuff out loud. You may fear that the person listening to you may judge you and what you’re saying. Do they like you? Will they embarrass or shame you when you spill out your fears and feelings?
In reality, counsellors and psychotherapists go through years of training and personal development to process their own issues so they can be fully present for their clients. Therapists don’t judge, shame, or impose their own opinions on you. They offer a safe, confidential and empathic space for you to explore the darkest corners of your psyche. Therapy can help bring unconscious issues into consciousness where you’re able to explore and discuss them. When you become more aware of what is going on, and your issues are out in the open, they can have less of a hold on you, and you can feel lighter and freer as a result. Let the relationship with your therapist build to a point where you feel safe and supported to let everything come out in its own time.
  1. Fear of seeming mad/weird/abnormal
A common fear is that people will think you’re mad if you’re seeking therapy. Surely it’s only for people with serious issues, right?
Wrong. Any problem that is getting in the way of you living your life is worth exploring and working through. It doesn’t matter if other people in your life don’t agree with, understand or support your decision to come to therapy. It’s irrelevant whether other people need support than you. Coming into therapy can be a way of creating the life you want, rather than enduring the life you’ve got.
  1. Fear of becoming dependent
If you’ve managed for years on your own then you may fear becoming dependent on your therapist – or wonder whether you will always be in therapy.
When therapy is going well, you can build a positive attachment to your therapist. He or she is the one who ‘gets’ you. They support you week on week as you grapple with the issues, behaviours, emotions and thoughts that are disrupting your life, and as you seek to understand why you are the way you are. You look forward to your sessions, you use your time to the full, and you are starting to see positive changes in your life.
The relationship with your therapist is not a dependent one. It is a relationship that nurtures growth. Your therapist can work on an open-ended basis with you, but you are the one who will know the point in your journey when you’re ready to walk alone. This can take weeks, months or years, depending on the issues you are bringing to therapy. You decide when you’re ready and your therapist will manage the ending so that you’re not left with any loose ends. The process will enable you to develop a stronger sense of self so that you feel more robust to face life without the old scaffolding.


This post first appeared on The Awareness Centre's Talking Therapy blog. 
https://www.linkedin.com/pulse/four-biggest-fears-people-have-coming-therapy-michaela-mccarthy




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16/9/2016 0 Comments

Lend an Ear - 5 Ways you can help a friend suffering from depression

We have busy lives, things happen that can bring us down so we feel stressed causing us to feel sad, depressed, that is normal. Ordinarily we would bounce back in a relatively short period of time. 
'Clinical Depression is different. It’s a medical disorder, and it won’t go away just because you want it to. It lingers for at least two consecutive weeks and significantly interferes with one’s ability to work, play or love.' Lisa LaBracio - TED
Depression is often invisible yet it can be very invasive. A friend told me recently that depression came to her like a jolt out of the blue. She found she withdrew from life, could not work, the smallest things seemed like massive challenges, answering the door, talking on the phone, making the bed. That was her reaction, a friend of hers reacted differently, wanted to be around someone all the time, endlessly talking over her life and what had happened, yet not able to move on and do anything about it. Another hid it, everything about her life seemed 'the usual'. What she did not see was the struggle going on daily to appear like everything was 'the usual' until the price that had to be paid for that struggle came at the bottom of a bottle of pills.
We all have extremely busy lives; but spending some time talking with friends or family, having a conversation, can help. You may notice something seems off, they might open up to you. Don't be nervous to have that conversation. It can save a life.
Here is the Ted-Ed post from Lisa LaBracio

1. Help them find help: If you know someone struggling with depression, encourage them – gently – to seek out help. You might even offer to help with specific tasks, like looking up therapists in the area or making a list of questions to ask a doctor. To someone with depression, these first steps can seem insurmountable.
2. Be informed: If they feel guilty or ashamed, point out that depression is a medical condition just like asthma or diabetes. It’s not a weakness or a personality trait, and they shouldn’t expect themselves to “just get over it” any more than they could will themselves to get over a broken arm. The more you know about mental illness, the better able you are to understand what they are going through, and to support them.
3. Don’t downplay it: If you haven’t experienced depression yourself, avoid comparing it to times you’ve felt down – comparing what they’re experiencing to normal, temporary feelings of sadness can make them feel guilty for struggling.
4. Stamp out stigma: Even just talking about depression openly can help. For example, research shows that asking someone about suicidal thoughts actually reduces their suicide risk. Open conversations about mental illness help erode stigma, and make it easier for people to ask for help. And, the more patients seek treatment, the more scientists will learn about depression, and the better the treatments will get.
5. Continue the conversation: Because depression’s symptoms are intangible, it’s hard to know who might look fine, but is actually struggling. Just because your friend may seem fine one day, don’t assume that they’ve ‘gotten better’. Remain supportive.
https://youtu.be/z-IR48Mb3W0

Links
Get Involved - Your Mental Health
Look After Your Mental Health - HSE
Do You Know Your Blind Spots


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30/8/2016 0 Comments

One at a Time

Your journey starts with one step and we're here to help you to take that step.
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7/4/2016 0 Comments

Hope

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5/4/2016 0 Comments

April 05th, 2016

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#counselling

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31/3/2016 0 Comments

Embrace Life

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    My name is Katrina Jones, the person behind New Dawn Counselling Service which is situated in Tullamore, Co Offaly. 
     I am a qualified Counsellor, Psychotherapist, and Hypnotherapist.

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